The below article is quoted entirely from The Fly Guy Chronicles
I am writing this because I'm interested in your take on his take (lol) so please comment:
Before I begin, let me make one thing very clear: I actually like Danity Kane (well, about as much as a guy can safely like a girl group without raising the collective eyebrows of his boys.) So this shouldn’t be viewed as me hating on them in any way, shape or form. I just happen to have a deep seated disdain for their latest single, “Damaged.” Why? Because as catchy as the tune may be, the underlying message of the song speaks to a long-standing issue that many women have when it comes to relationships. Well, I think it’s time I addressed and corrected this problem once and for all. Let’s take a look at the lyrics in question before I begin.
Do you got a first aid kit handy?
Do you know how to patch up a wound, tell me
Are you patient, understanding?
Cuz I might need some time to clear the hole in my heart
I tried every remedy and nothing seems to work for me
Baby, this situation’s driving me crazy
And I really want to be your lady
But the one before you left me
I thought that I should let you know
That my heart is
Damaged, so damaged
And you can blame the one before
So how you gonna fix?
The Fly Guy Perspective:
Okay, so let me get this straight, because I don’t want to misquote you…
So you were in a relationship that in the end left you more jacked up than Mike Tyson’s credit score. But instead of just taking the time to work through your issues and heal your broken heart, you now want to start something new with me. To make matters worse, you’re expecting me to solve those same problems which should have been fixed before you even entertained an “us.”
Do you understand how that sounds?
That’s like me buying a plasma TV from Best Buy, getting it broken, and then taking it to Circuit City and calmly asking them, “So how are you going to fix this?”
They’d probably kick me out of the store right? My point exactly.
That same type of reasoning should be applied to your relationships. There are far too many women who expect…no demand that the new guy pay restitution for the sins of the previous one. Trust me, we have all experienced the hurt, harm and pain that comes with relationships. But if I can’t get credit for the good things that your last man did, then how dare you ask me to be responsible for all of the bad things that he did???
There needs to be some sort of compromise ladies.
So if you still insist on us fixing the damage caused by him, then here are a few of our demands that must be met. I respectfully submit these on behalf of the members of NAAFUM (The National Association for the Advancement of Fed Up Men)
1. A tax break on every dinner he ever treated you to (example…taking you to McDonald’s will now carry the same value as treating you to a five-star restaurant).
2. Once a week, we can decline participation in any conversation concerning our feelings, and it can’t be held against us.
3. We no longer have to sit at the mall and watch you try on the SAME shoe in every color. (Truth be told, beige and cream look exactly alike to us.)
4. All major championship series and games will now be considered national holidays where our focus on said games can’t and won’t be interrupted by you (this includes any NFL, MLB, NBA, NHL, NCAA, Professional Boxing, PGA, Arena League Football, or any other
sporting event that may come up.)
If you cannot meet these demands, then there is another alternative:
You can stop asking us how we’re going to fix the pain of your past.
Instead, just be open and honest about the issues that you’re working through, and if we so desire, then we can work on them together. I guarantee you that more men will be willing to step up to the plate, and be there for you. But that will only happen if we’re given free will to make our own decision, instead of having that expectation unfairly placed upon us. So what do you say…do we have a deal?